Say what!
by TheDoctorWatson
Summary: Joan and Sherlock must become a couple to save the lives of pregnant women from a dangerous killer. Idea is overused, but YOWO(you only write once). T for IDK reasons other than being absolutely sure.
1. Chapter 1

"Joan!"  
"Yeah?"  
Joan poked her head out of the kitchen into the living room.  
"Can you come over here?"  
"Well, you're being pleasant. Of course." She walked in, holding her cup of coffee.  
"I have been contacted by Bell. He asked me if we could do an undercover case."  
Joan took another sip of her coffee, motioning for him to continue. He took a deep breath.  
"We have to go undercover as a married couple."  
She spit her coffee all over his face.  
"WHAT!?"  
Sherlock reached quickly into his pocket to pull out a handkerchief which he used to wipe his face of the hot liquid.  
"You heard me, Watson."  
"Wh-wh-why?"  
"I'll explain. There is a killer out there that has been killing young pregnant women. We suspect it is a doctor named Molly Carmen. We also suspect this is an alias. What we need to do is act like a married couple and go to this doctor because you are "pregnant"."  
"So you're saying she might kill me."  
He shook his head.  
"No, Joan, I could never put you in danger."  
She tipped back her head and laughed at that. He looked exasperated.  
"What she does is she prescribes the women a medicine that kills them from inside. She makes it herself, which is why it isn't checked."  
"Alright, but how am I," she patted her stomach, "a non-pregnant woman going to show up pregnant on tests and stuff?"  
"We've thought of that. There is a drug you can take that can alter your metabolism and other systems to make you show up pregnant on tests."  
"Do I have a choice?"  
He nodded. "Yes, you do, but just know that if you decline, more and more innocent woman are going to die."  
She sighed. "I-I accept."  
He jumped up out of his chair.  
"Thank you Watson!"  
Watson smiled. "You are welcome."


	2. Chapter 2

"Joan. Has Sherlock briefed you?"  
"Somewhat."  
Joan and Sherlock were sitting in the police station. Gregson and Bell were across from them.  
"Do you feel like you need anymore information?" Bell asked.  
"Just a little. I-Is there a chance that I w-will not survive this?"  
The two gulped.  
"T-there is a slight chance that the medicine might affect your reproductive system. Also, p-p-possibly your vascular system."  
She was stunned.  
"So...so...so I could die?"  
The men nodded.  
"B-but it could save lives?"  
They nodded again.  
"O-o-o...okay. L-lets get started."  
Sherlock smiled grimly. "Indeed."  
"Alright. Sherlock, you will be playing Jon Miller. You, Joan, will be playing Lucy Miller, his wife. Sherlock, you work at the Apple Store as a technician. You, Joan, will be a waitress."  
"Really? With all my years of education at a top college, all you could come up with for me is WAITRESS?! SERIOUSLY?!"  
Gregson and Bell shifted in their chairs. Then Sherlock spoke up.  
"Well Watson, I must admit. You make a decent cup of coffee. You're not a bad cook, either."  
She smiled.  
"Thank you. But really?"  
They pulled out a picture of a nice house. "You two will be living here."  
Sherlock scrutinized it. "Looks nice."  
She nodded.  
"You guys must remember not to use your skills. Like Sherlock? No deductions. And Joan? No medical stuff."  
They nodded. "I'll try."  
"Alright. Other than that, you can be yourselves. Oh! Sherlock, no British accent."  
He nodded again.  
"Lets get you guys dressed."  
"Wait what?!"  
"We need to put you guys on character. To do so we need you to dress the part. We are going shopping."  
They were dragged out of their chairs and went to the costume department.  
"Joan, Sherlock, meet Alexis."  
"Hello! I'm gonna make you two gorgeous. Joan, for you I have this rack set up. Sherlock, here is yours." She pointed to two racks. "Find some clothes you like and try them on. Dressing rooms are that way." She pointed to a door. "Have fun!"  
Joan looked at Sherlock and shrugged. She went over and picked out a nice black blouse, not too fancy looking, and a pair of jeans. He found a comfy looking button up shirt and a pair of suit pants. They went to try them on.  
A few minutes later, they emerged looking fashionable and clean. No more ironic T-shirts for Sherlock. They were ready for business.


End file.
